Saying Goodbye Is Not Easy

It's been a very long time since I've posted anything on the blog. I sincerely apologize for this. On April 10, 2015 I lost my grandfather who was 85 years old. While he lived his life to the fullest potential, it doesn't make it easier to say goodbye. I am extremely close with my grandparents and this loss has been the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.

He went in for open heart surgery on the morning of April 10th. While the surgery was successful, he suffered from complications afterwards. I thought I was driving to the hospital to see him in recovery but instead I went to meet an unexplained circumstance.

My grandfather has only ever shown me love - unconditional love. Even if he did get angry, it was because he cared. Some of the best memories I have of him are from my childhood, which involved playing ball, feeding the birds or buying slurpies for us. He always instilled his knowledge and gave us his advice when we were troubled or lost. I will never forget his blue eyes, or all the times he smiled or laughed, or the way he walked, his shoes that he wore or how he answered the phone. I even know his favourite Tim Hortons order: small decaf coffee with 2 cream and 1 sugar. There are just so many things I can write about him...

I've never experienced loss this close to me. Unless you go through it, you don't know the pain involved with losing a loved one so close and dear to you. It's been three weeks yes, but it's also been three very hard weeks. I'm not sure if my life will ever be the same. No matter how much you try to move on, there is always a little empty space in my heart that misses him so much. But I remember him in my day to day life, whether its through the sunshine, the flowers or the wind.

I only have one grandmother left now. While it's sad that we always remember after something tragic happens to hold the ones that are close to us even closer, we should always try to remember to laugh a little harder, cuddle a little more or hug a little longer. Even though my grandfather lived his life to 85, 85 years was still too short...

You will be missed greatly and will forever be in our hearts...

~RANDOMiss